As you can see from the title, this post will be a little different. I am breaking it up into several parts, so we will see how it goes.
When I was a little girl, I use to love to go fishing with my Dad. Oh the joys of reeling in a fish, (even the little ones) were so exciting! Of course, there were some that were "keepers" and there were those that were the "catch and release" kind and then, sadly enough were the "Ones that got away." Part one will take me on a trip down memory lane, and I am going to share with you my stories about the "ones that got away." For all discretion, all names have been changed to protect the innocent. Oh, and maybe I had better plead the the fifth amendment as well, for security reasons. LOL!
My first love, or what I will refer to as "Guppy Love," occurred when I was very young, about 6 years old. Allen and I attended church together, my older sister ( who was 9 years older than me) was dating "Allen's" older brother, Wendell.
This was sweet, innocent love. We would sit next to each other at church, hold hands, we even sang a song together, and one time he sent me a card on which he had written the words, "I love you turely." Yes, that is exactly the words he used, and looking back now, I would give anything to have kept that precious card. Well, eventually my older sister broke up with Wendell, and we switched churches and that was then end of my dear Allen. I often wonder were he is; is he on facebook? But alas, Allen was the first one that got away.
Next, when I was in Junior High, I had a huge crush on Gabriel. Now I was poor, chubby, lived on the wrong side of the tracks, had no self esteem whatsoever, and Gabriel, well, let's just say I felt like I was never in His league. He was the one the most popular girls liked, and because of my insecurity, I never made my true feelings known to him. And so, "Gabriel" become the second in my series of the ones that got away. And I regret to this day once more, that I didn't have the courage to tell him how I felt about him. So wherever you are now "Gabriel," you now know the truth.
Flash forward 20 years later. I was at that point, a single mom, raising two young daughters on my own, (which turned out to be for 11 long years.) Then I met "Peter." Unfortunate for me, when I first met Peter, he had just came out of a broken relationship that had left him wounded, cautious, and gun shy of another relationship. Peter and I however became great friends, my daughters loved him, and I must now be totally honest and confess, that I loved him too. Sadly enough, our paths kept criss crossing at the most inopportune times. He would be ready for a relationship and by that point I would be in one with someone. Then I would be ready for a relationship and he would not be available. We did this song and dance routine for several years. One of the last times we had dinner together, Peter told me that he had recently met someone. Little did I realize until much later that he really wanted me to say, "No, choose, me." In fact, years later after we both were married by that time, he revealed to me that if I had said something to him, showing interest in him, he would have chosen me over her, because they were not serious at that point. Stupid, Stupid, Stupid me! Of course, we have never spoken since; he is still happily married, and I am now divorced from said husband and now also, "Sleepless in South Carolina." I do not begrudge his happiness whatsoever; his wife is a lucky woman. I just made a foolish choice to let him be another one of the ones that got away.( sigh)
Finally, the last one, James. James was a good man, a keeper. I was foolish for more reasons than I will admit. James and I dated and eventually got engaged to be married; however, (and I can't believe I am actually sharing this info) one week before the wedding, I called it off for stupid crazy reasons. Crazy reason number one: James worked on the river, which meant he would be gone for long periods of time; at least 30 days, sometimes even longer. Then he would come back for two weeks, then leave again. I had this stupid idea in my head that I didn't want a "part time husband." LOL! If I was going to be a wife, I wanted the whole 24/7 husband experience. Boy, was I naive. Second crazy reason: since I was raised poor most of my life, in my adulthood, I had learned to enjoy decorating my home beautifully, yet economically. I loved having a fabric tablecloth on my dining room table, pretty stone wear dishes, place mats, and fabric napkins. I had evolved into a mini Martha Stewart! When I entertained, I was very much a traditionalist, in food and decor. My first Christmas dinner at his house was a culture shock to say the least. They served a CANNED HAM! OMG! and SPAGHETTI, and POTATO SALAD on PAPER PLATES!! At CHRISTMAS for goodness sakes! To make it worse, I came bringing some fancy side dish, and the icing on the cake was that his mother's nickname for me was "Miss Prissy Britches. So yes, I let James go for stupid foolish reasons, and he was the last of the ones that got away. ( that shouldn't have) And yes, James met somebody else, and eventually married her. (sigh, again)
So there my readers, are my sad fish tales about the ones who got away. Do you have any tales you would like to share? Please feel free to post them as a comment; see link below. Next time we will continue discussing "Plenty of Fish in The Sea," so be sure and stay tuned for more from "Sleepless In South Carolina."
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